My God is a loving God, but my God is a jealous God. I realize that I have put my heart’s desire for a loving wife and family above my desire to serve God, and I do not believe that pleases Him. Perhaps He already gave me the wife he picked for me; perhaps that marriage was a mistake. Regardless, I am blessed to have a son from that union that I love and who loves me in return. I also have a daughter from that union that doesn’t love me and rejects me. Love and rejection, that is what God gives and what he receives. He has allowed me to experience both those things within my own family. Rejection is painful, but God has told me that he has allowed me to experience rejection because he knows I need to feel what He feels if I am to grow spiritually, understand Him, and love Him. I also need to experience truly forgiving those who reject me. I praise God for experiencing both love and rejection, because it will help me as I seek to submit to Him and become more Christ like.
Kahle Jennings
August 5, 2019 (revised 9-29-19)